


The Perfect Family

by MarcellusMiro66



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Dark Comedy, Horror, Psychological Horror
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-24
Updated: 2019-03-24
Packaged: 2019-12-06 21:56:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18225926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarcellusMiro66/pseuds/MarcellusMiro66
Summary: There's no such thing as too perfect, right...?





	The Perfect Family

_Lincoln was laying down in his bed, bouncing a blue ball against his bedroom wall in the wake of boredom..._

After a seemingly harmless chain of events resulted in a family portrait being destroyed, his sisters (sans Lily) were understandably furious. Of course, he himself felt angry as much as they were, regret prevailing his every emotions whenever he encountered his siblings in the house or at the school. His parents weren't as much as his sisters, but they felt the need to punish him to teach a lesson and please their insatiable daughters. Doing half of the chores intended for half of his sisters, prohibited from using any form of technology, barred from seeing his friends during non-school hours, and that was just the tip of the iceberg. However, contrary to popular belief, Lincoln actually didn't mind. He believed that he deserved this sentence and fully lamented the occurrence that stemmed from his role in it.

Time and absence really did the heart grow fonder, though, and his sisters seemed to rebuild their respective relationships with their brother from scratch. Being the eldest sibling, Lori was the first to do so, followed by Leni, Luna, and so on. Lincoln couldn't help but feel that something was sorely amiss, and lo and behold, it turns out that their acts of kindness were exactly that: acts. Their plan was to lead him into a sense of false reassurance waiting until the proper moment where they would unleash a fury of prank-worthy madness, serving as a final lesson to teach their "idiot brother". It wasn't difficult to figure out said plan considering that it was discussed in Lori and Leni's bedroom, but it wasn't easy to digest and process the hateful words exchanged involving him, either. Even so, Lincoln soldiered on in the passing weeks and kept his knowledge of his sisters' plan to himself.

_I hate to tell you...but it gets worse._

Lincoln's ears perked up at what appeared to be the sound of a large vehicle approaching outside. He shot up and turned to face his circular window, which he climbed up towards to take a peak. The vehicle in question was a moving truck (two of them, actually), with a white station wagon following not too far behind. When the moving trucks slowed to a stop, the station wagon followed suit before the driver and its front passenger stepped out in unison. The former was a middle-aged man with brunette hair, blue eyes, a navy blue suit jacket, a white long-sleeve collared shirt, navy blue trousers, a gold necktie, and black business shoes. The latter was a young woman in her late 30s with dark brown hair, light brown eyes, a sapphire blue suit jacket, a white long-sleeve button shirt, a sapphire business skirt, a red fedora, and black business flats. The couple closed their doors and simultaneously opened the following pairs and two pairs of six children marched out. Each of them donned a different color of the rainbow as well as those not associated with it. Red, blue, purple, white, grey, silver, black, and yellow were to name a few. While the siblings shared quite a colorful aesthetic, it seemed that you couldn't beat out the simplicity of black-and-white morality.

Case in point, the girl who seemed to be his own age (perhaps younger) and donned those very colors with a hint of blue. Her eyes were blue like her father's, her hair was brunette like her mother's, and she wore a plain black T-shirt above a white short-sleeved collared shirt, a black skirt with blue polka-dots, and black-and-white Converse sneakers with blue shoelaces...a style unlike her siblings. Her hair was tied in a low ponytail that hung from her right side (left from his point of view) and contained straight-cut bangs at her eyebrows.  _Who is that...?_ Too distracted to even assume that time indeed flew on by, he continued to watch her help the rest of her family move their belongings into the house until...

"Lincoln! Lincoln!"

He gasped in alarm before hopping down from his spot near the window, running over to pull open the door...and find Lori holding a tray of steaming whatever-it-was with a sickly sweet smile plastered on her face...the same sickly sweet smile from a few days ago.

"Mom and I were wondering... Do you think you can deliver this tray of apple pie over to our new neighbors?"

The young boy carefully observed the tray and noticed a red LED strobe flashlight lamp hanging conspicuously beneath the tin foil.

_It's a trap..._

"Sure. Why not?" Lincoln snatched the tray from his sister and quickly retreated downstairs to exit through the front door. Walking from one house to the next, he knocked on the door and stood there for a few minutes or so before the door opened. The married couple from earlier answered the call and glanced down, a married couple of gleeful grins aimed towards the young boy.

"Can we help you?"

Only slightly unnerved by the simultaneous response, Lincoln held back a deep gulp and presented the tray of freshly baked apple pie to them. "I... I was sent by my family to deliver this to you. It's freshly baked apple pie."

If it was humanly possible, their smiles grew even wider. "Oh! Apple pie is Lyla's favorite! Come inside!"

Lincoln did just that and was immediately greeted by semi-elegant décor that was spread around the house's interior. The main color palette was red, blue, and golden yellow splattered all over a white background. A crystal chandelier hung from above, shining bright like a diamond or two million. Two staircases were connected by one, both of which led upstairs to what he presumed to be the bedrooms of the children. The kitchen, complete with the stove and an on-top microwave, was located a few feet away right next to the living room, which housed a flat-screen TV, a smooth brown coffee table, and a lit fireplace. His eyes widened in horrified shock at the pump-action shotgun and box of shells displayed above it...but the father misinterpreted it as admired shock. "I take it you're impressed, kiddo?"

Lincoln managed to snap out of it, though, and respond under the false pretense he was. He was impressed, but the mounted weapon didn't give off this impression. "Yes, I am. How did you manage to afford all this?"

"Well..." He rubbed the back of his head in actual embarrassment, "My friend lost a bet, so he had to repay me."

"And the rest is history," The mother affectionately rested her head on his shoulder.

"Speaking of which..." The three of them watched as one of the couple's eldest slid down the stairs and landed on her feet to walk into the living room. "What's this kid's history?"

"Oh, Lauren. This is one of our new neighbors," The father answered for him. "He just visited to give us some of his family's freshly baked apple pie."

"Hey, isn't that Lyla's favorite?"

"That's what I said."

"Hey, Lyla! A lover boy's got something here for ya!"

"Now, Lauren..." The mother lightly chastised her eldest, "Let's not tease away our fellow neighbor out of spite, huh?"

"Relax, Mom, I was just joking around. I'm only calling him that because he's around her age and seems fairly nervous. I really can't blame him if he snuck a peek at my little sis already." Lauren turned tail and walked back upstairs to summon Lyla herself. Lincoln stood there in thought while the mother patted him on the shoulder for reassurance.

"Oh, pay no attention to Lauren. She's like that around new neighbors. A tension-cutting joke is valid on occasion, though."

Lincoln could only smile back as he was led into the kitchen while the other siblings raced down the stairs, unlike their pair of single-file lines when exiting the car and entering the house. He secretly wished that his family was like that. He felt like a stranger here, an outcast. He didn't belong here. Taking a seat across the parents, he placed down the apple pie and listened as the ensuing questions overwhelmed him.

"Are you new here too...?"

"Do you live in an extended family...?"

"What's up with your hair...?"

"Everyone, everyone!" The mother tapped a spoon against a wine glass, "Let's give the young man room to speak for himself!"

The problem was, Lincoln didn't want to speak for himself. He, with the exception of Lucy, was the quietest of his 11 siblings. As with most preteens his age, he didn't feel particularly comfortable introducing himself to anyone other than his family and friends. It was like being in a new classroom on your first day of school: you don't know anyone, but you have to formally present yourself to them. It was torture without the body horror.

"Mom, he doesn't have to go into full detail on his personal life. He can just state his identity and the reason why he is here at the present moment." Fortunately, somebody understood him. He inwardly sighed in relief and gestured to the apple pie as he spoke, "Hello. My name is Lincoln Loud, and I'm here because...I don't want the apple pie to blow up in your face."

He was met with a wave of momentary silence confusion when someone commented, "Oh, we wouldn't worry. We don't have a trickster sibling for nothing now."

That statement needed for his confirmation, Lincoln quickly pulled back the tin foil and... **_BOOM!_**

The turnover unsurprisingly performed its duty, exploding all over the place and sprinkled the family (sans two) with bits of apple and crust. Another moment of silence ensued before the youngest giggled and tasted whatever was on her face and in her hair. This prompted the rest to do the same and murmur in agreement on the undeniable deliciousness on the now destroyed apple pie. Lincoln again sighed inwardly in relief. _Well, that went better than I expected..._ He watched as the family chattered happily whilst chewing down on the remnants of the pastry, a stark contrast to his own familial conversations at either tables, which mostly comprised of nothing but tossed zucchini and Mom's spaghetti. 

After a moment, Lincoln politely asked to use the bathroom in order to wash his hands. Granted permission, he traveled upstairs and took a look around. Compared to his family's, it was very neat and spacious, with white marble tiles serving as a reflection and an even whiter bathtub that came with a showerhead and its curtain. Located across the toilet but next to the stall was the sink, complete with golden levers and a silver faucet; the white towels were hanging a few inches away. Gazing at himself in the mirror, he proceeded to do what he came up here to do. 

_Wow. This new family seems nice enough. Perhaps too nice enough. They somehow managed to unpack their belongings in a matter of hours, they didn't seem to mind an exploding apple pie ruining their clothes, and they had a shotgun mounted atop the fireplace. They...they were like my family. If better than..._

Shaking his head, Lincoln dried his hands and turned to head back downstairs...

"AAH!"

…but was caught off guard by the sudden appearance of a girl. A girl who seemed to be around his age with her father's blue eyes, her mother's brunette hair, and an unique fashion style that consisted of black-and-white polka dots. With those eyes of a doe, she tilted her head and the questions she asked in return for an answer couldn't be more sincere and concern-ridden than it was now.

"Are you okay? Did I...scare you?"

He was starting to feel guilty and immediately backtracked himself. "No. No, of course not. I was just...caught off guard."

"Yeah, I get that a lot. That's why I moved here."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I don't want people to feel guilty for something they weren't responsible for."

"... Ok then. So, you're new around here, right?"

"Right you are. We made our decision to move here just a few months ago; this place seemed quiet enough. It was a _long_ 14-hour drive here from Massachusetts to Michigan."

"Well, I guess you must be tired, huh?"

"Not really. I'm a night owl."

"A what-now?"

"A night owl. That means I'm usually active at night and don't fall asleep until four in the morning."

"Wow. That's actually impressive."

"I know it is. My parents comment on it every time. So, with that in mind...do you think you can show me around the city?"

Lincoln's breath got caught in his throat as he processed the question asked by the girl. "T-Tonight?"

The girl nodded and flashed that sincere grin whilst flashing her doe-like eyes. "Whenever you can."

As much as Lincoln wanted to contend that sneaking out in the middle of the night (even for something as harmless for a tour of the town) was a _very_ bad idea, he couldn't help but fall under the spell of this equally harmless preteen girl. She was something of a manic pixie dream girl straight out of the movies, an eccentric and beautiful female character that served as the love interest teaching the protagonist important life lessons while getting into wacky misadventures along the way. _Wait a minute... Don't I have one already?_ It was true that he and Ronnie Anne weren't exactly the best of lovers, but their friendship equaled that of his and Clyde's. Then again, they were just friends. Nothing beyond that.

"Sure. I'll try."

"Great. I'll wait for you." The girl turned to head back downstairs before Lincoln realized something. 

"Wait! I didn't get your name!"

"It's Lyla!" The girl then slid down the stair rails and into the kitchen, leaving him with his breath caught in his throat again. Regaining his composure, he headed downstairs to join the rest of the family.

Later that night, Lincoln waited until everybody was asleep to get ready for his escorting of Lyla. Knowing that the weather would be a bit breezy from dusk to dawn, he slipped on a black leather jacket above a long-sleeved yellow shirt, navy blue jeans, and his signature pair of white sport shoes with red stripes. Coincidentally, this was the exact same set of clothing he previously wore in order to impress the previously new girl on the block. Stella did accept him for who he was in the end, but it's the thought that counted. 

Sneaking downstairs and out the front door, Lincoln glanced around and began to jog towards Lyla's house, where he found her standing underneath a tree similar to his wearing a black long-sleeve dress with a white Peter Pan collar and black Mary Janes. Spotting him nearby, she waved him over and waited until he was right beside her.

"Hi!"

"Hey."

"You're here early."

"Ten o'clock is early for you?"

"Not really. The earliest for me is midnight."

"Why?"

"I'll explain later. Ready?"

"Sure."

Side by side, Lincoln and Lyla walked into the city...unaware that something - **_someone_** \- was watching them from the shadows...


End file.
